Pre-Birthday Reflection 🤍

With my birthday coming up in June, I’ve been reflecting on the beautiful mess of being human. I’m far from perfect; I have my flaws, and life can be chaotic. But what I’m feeling most grateful for right now, something I definitely take for granted sometimes, is my circle of family and friends who make me feel loved, accepted, and valued just as I am.

As we get older, we’re told that we naturally "stop caring" about people who don’t like us or treat us in the way that we expect; but it’s not always that simple. Some of us are just more sensitive. Caring about how you’re perceived isn't a character flaw; it’s being human. We’re wired for connection, so when someone makes us feel less than, it hurts.

But here is the truth we tend to forget every time we feel the sting: the way someone treats you is rarely actually about you. Reflecting on the moments someone has made me feel invalid, I’ve noticed a pattern. Every single time, that person was dealing with a massive issue, a deep insecurity, or a void in their own life whether it's from a important relationship or within themselves. Often, it comes from a place of deep-seated sadness they don't know how to handle.

When someone is dismissive or rude, it almost always stems from a wound they haven't dealt with. Secure people don’t go around making others feel small. If someone is incapable of seeing your value, it’s usually because they’re struggling to see their own.

A birthday goal of mine, as I work on being a better person, is to stop looking for warmth from everyone. Life is too short to waste energy on things and people that ultimately don’t matter. I’m shifting my energy toward the people who actually matter: the ones who express gratitude, check in when I’m down, and sit with me even when I’m not the most "fun" to be around. I’m prioritizing those who show kindness back and make me feel welcomed; not just when it’s convenient for them.

I’m also learning to accept people as they are. If someone doesn’t like me, that’s okay. If someone is rude, I’m learning to empathize with the fact that they must be in a difficult place, and then I’m letting them dwell in that space while I move forward in mine. People's problems aren't ours to take on. Most importantly, I’m refocusing on the people who are truly invaluable to me, and taking all that energy I once wasted on the wrong places and giving it back to myself.

As I plan my birthday and think about who I want to celebrate with, I’m filled with this quiet, deep gratitude. Not just for another year, but for every genuine soul I’ve had the pleasure of meeting (and that includes so many of you). I’m just as thankful for the hard lessons, too - every experience has helped me grow and prepared me for whatever is coming next.

To everyone who has watched me evolve, loved me through my worst moments, and made me feel cherished simply by being in my corner: thank you for being part of my story.

You don't need everyone to love you. You just need the right ones. 🤍 And on that final note, here’s a quick video to lighten the mood: